Tag Archives: Parenting

Tough Love

Mother and Daughter
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I was maybe eight or nine.  Mommy and I were playing Scrabble.  And she was clobbering me, her scores outmatching mine.  At that young age, I wondered why she would not let me win a match even just once.

Now I know why.

Mommy’s refusal to let me win showed how she believed in her daughter’s ability to go toe to toe with her.  It also showed her refusal to stroke my ego by letting me win albeit untruthfully.

Mommy taught me how to lose.  And in doing so, she taught me how to accept defeat with grace.  But she did more than that.  In teaching me how to lose at such a young age, she armed me with valuable lessons and truths about life that helped me get to where I am now.

For instance, she taught me that life is not always about winning.  In as much as our game of Scrabble was more about having fun during the game, life is also more about having fun while living.

Mommy taught me that I cannot expect people, even those whom I  love to always go easy on and be gentle with me.  Once in a while, people will knowingly or unknowingly hurt me and I must forgive them for that.

She taught me that in life, I get to face bigger foes and many difficult challenges, but tackling them head on is better that backing down and not learning anything at all.

That losing does not mean the end.  Life goes on.  And so we must too.

That perseverance will take me to where my defeated self cannot go.  I can definitely do better and get it right the next time (I won my first match against Mommy when I was about ten).

More than anything, my game of Scrabble with my mommy has taught me that love can get tough, but it’s love just the same.

Happy Mother’s Day, Mommy!  🙂

Nobody but Herself

12-istock-Mother-swinging-daughter-Small

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“She’s going to be a doctor,” the mother said as she eyed her daughter with pride. The other mothers who were with her on the busy playground one lazy Saturday afternoon nodded as they too shared their wishes for their respective children. One wanted her daughter to be a lawyer. Another wanted her son to be an engineer. And another wanted her son to be a successful businessman. One mother in particular was especially quiet so the others turned their attention to her and asked, “How about your child?” And she smiled before saying, “I want her to be nobody but herself.”

What a wonderful mom she is. This woman who wanted her daughter to be just herself. It doesn’t matter if she becomes a doctor. Or a teacher. Or an actress.  What’s more important is that she becomes her own self. In a world where most parents impose on their children to live their (parents) dream for them, this one mom broke the mold by letting her daughter choose who and what she wants her self to be.